Life Saving Tips

I'm again in God mode so here are some tips that may keep you alive in those rare situations. Like all good gospels I take give no guarantee that if you preach to a lion it shall not devour you in the process and thank me so these are just tips no assurances
Hmmm now the valuable information that my trolling human knowledge has bestowed on me
1. If marooned in sea in a dinghy but no food or water, you catch a fish do not try to eat it. Raw fish is hard to digest and will make you thirsty. You can live maybe a month without food but not a week without water. instead suck its eyeballs to get some water and spew the rest out. Note to fish: if you see a dinghy with folks swim away for your life.
2. If buried in snow in Alps and the rompy Bernard comes with brandy around neck, chuck the hooch and hug the pooch, its warmer. brandy shall make the blood go to the skin and loose more heat. You may keep the brandy for later log fire story session though.
3. If a she asks you "do I look too fat" pretend to choke on air and practice temporary loss of voice. while doing this keep shaking your head in "no" kind of way.